Confessions of an Undisguised Drama Queen

Saturday, December 31, 2005

à la fin du chapitre

I've come to the end of a year; 12 months; 365 long days.

It occurs to me now, that as I get older, the weight of a single year increases exponentially. Partly because of the fear of aging, but more so because of the greater expectations I have of myself.

Knowing that the number of good years left on this place can only get smaller, there's a sense of urgency to get things done within the next year.

Goals to be achieved, tasks to be accomplished, resolutions to fulfill, moments to experience.

To learn, to live, to love, before it's all too late and opportunities pass by without making a U-turn.

I remember a friend sharing with me a quote by Ghandi: Live as if you're to die tomorrow, learn as if you're to live forever; and we would laugh over the irony of it. Honestly, if I were to die tomorrow, I probably won't give a shit about learning.

Then again, maybe not.

I think it's just the year-end mood... it's making me feel all solemn and philosophical. But is there any point in that? Reflecting on how I've grown (or not) over this past year, will it make me a better person in the next? Will mulling over this year's events give a clearer direction for me in 2006?

No one can really give me answers but myself.

I feel so alone.

[Time of Confession] 1:42 PM
1 Wisecracks for Me

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1 Comments:

peabrain_mokkie_atwork said...: oh the quote!! the quote!! do u remember who told u that quote! hahahahhahaa u remember???!!!! hahahahahaha anyway there are some things in life that u've gotto try out before u know it'll be a lesson learnt or an experience that's not to be missed! in life, we lose some, we gain some! so there's always something nice out there babe! it's all in the mind! how u wan things to be, and how u view those happenings! yeah!!! enjoy ur NEW YEAR!; 4:32 PM