Confessions of an Undisguised Drama Queen

Wednesday, December 15, 2004

Sighs

A friend once told me that everytime you sigh, you shorten your life by a second. It that's true, I'd probably die by the age of forty. And that's not just for me. It's probably the case for most people.

When you're sad, you sigh. When you're happy, you sigh. When you're worried, you sigh. When you're relieved, you sigh..... etc.etc.

Now, I'm sighing because I feel bored.

There's nothing worth doing.

I have no books to read (other than the textbooks on my shelf and they are screaming at me "Leave us alone!"), no one to talk to (that's the thing about staying in a single room), nothing to watch (there's nothing good on tv and my short attention span is preventing me from sitting through a whole movie). --> you can probably deduce that i'm having a rather aimless existence.

In the past 3 days, I have practically lived, breathed and wrote all about sports (i'm actually in the publications subcommittee for the interhall games). This is so unlike my former more well-rounded days before the holidays. Then, I do admit times were rather tough as I struggled to juggle my various commitments - schoolwork, giving tuition, training for squash competitions and the likes of these. It was all a relief when my exams came to an end.... BUT.... right now, I feel a sense of loss.

Like I lack a certain motivation or aim. Whatever I do now, I'm just doing it for the sake of responsibility. How do I find back that passion and drive?

I would like to apologise to my friends and hall mates who are slogging their guts out at every single sports training and matches while all I seem to be doing is complain and complain even more.

Darn. I can't help but feel really useless around here. Maybe I should just f*** off.

[Time of Confession] 10:20 PM
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